Apart from turning my hand to anything and everything this lockdown, gardening, harrowing the fields, lambing, interior decorating, playing the piano – none of which I have a clue about but I’m loving it albeit curbing the anxiety levels seeing close family stricken with the virus and fearful about not being able to set up a new practise. Yes I know I am beyond fortunate being up North and no longer penned in London. But I have been reflecting on happiness in this anxious isolated time. What makes one happy?
I know unique to each person, but I wanted to share my thoughts which I hope may bring some happiness and hope to my friends, family and all NHS staff, carers and volunteers who I’m sending out my heart who have had their plans put on hold, who are unwell, who have lost loved ones, who are suffering pain, both physically and mentally. So here are my top 5 nuggets of wisdom to create inner happiness:
Take control of negative thoughts:
We all have negative thoughts, the mind is created to think this way. But the mind is a muscle, it needs training and you can train it to think positively. Every negative thought you have counteract it with a positive narrative. E.g “the world will never recover after such a crisis” replace with “What can I do to help others during and after the crisis?”“What do I want the world to be?” “How can we create a world with a different value system?” How can we heal through this crisis and learn from it?”
Gratitude:
Every morning wake up and write down 3 things you are grateful for: it can be anything, from having 3 hours sleep, to a roof over your head. Through the Law of Attraction, the more grateful you are the more you will attract the things into your life and live love the life you want and love. Gratitude moves Qi and prevents stagnation and illness. This morning I was grateful for not seeing my breathe when I woke up for the first time in the last 2 months. Thank you for this sunshine and a break in the freeze up north finally.
Acceptance
This is what it is. It’s totally horrific on every level. Our loved ones are dying. But it’s about accepting the situation and within that acceptance working out what you can actively do to make your life better. Make a mood board. Cut out pictures and be specific of what you want in your life from love, to children, to having the will power to start a new career or put your all in to your current job on rather than seeing the grass as always greener.
“See the world as your self.
Have faith in the way things are.
Love the world as your self,
Then you can care for all things”
Dao De Jing, Chapter 13
Mindfulness:
Be aware of everything you do. From getting out of bed, to brushing your teeth to yelling at your kids, teaching them to cook you lunch, to doing the laundry. Be present. Stop the constant buzzing and chatter in your head, which is more often than not unhelpful, sink this nonsense out of your head in to the ground, let the constant ripples in the pond settle so your heart and mind can be still and calm. Meditate, do Qi gong, do yoga or do whatever it takes to be more mindful and present.
Compassion:
STOP any criticism towards yourself. Talk to yourself with compassion, love and kindness – if you can’t be that person to yourself then who else will. Talk to yourself as if you were a best friend. My hope is for a more kind, loving and compassionate world to be born from this devastation.
But my advice for happiness: you can have everything in the world, and still not be happy, it is not the materials you have nor the cards you have been dealt in life, but I hope by applying some of the above your life will be more prolific, happy and peaceful whatever the crisis.
Am happy to consult you for free over the phone or Skype to guide you through this tricky time. Just email me to arrange an appointment: laura@lauraboscawen.com
